TIL a beta reader called my main character 'a list of traits, not a person'

They said 'show me why he cares about his sister in one action, not three paragraphs of backstory,' so I cut the flashback and wrote a scene where he fixes her broken bike chain. Anyone have a trick for making characters feel real without dumping their whole history?

3 comments

3 Comments

harper90821d ago

Honestly, that feedback sounds a bit dramatic. Your bike chain fix shows way more than a list of traits.

karenm4921d ago

Exactly, that's what I was trying to say. People get too hung up on formal feedback and forget what actually gets done day to day. Fixing a bike chain on the spot shows problem-solving, patience, and follow-through way better than some bullet point on a review. I'd take real-world examples over a list any day. What did the original feedback even say?

troy43917d ago

My uncle was a mechanic who never said "I love you" but would drive 40 miles to fix my car when it broke down. Actions really do build character better than any list of adjectives. That bike chain scene probably tells us more about the brother than a whole childhood flashback. Good call on cutting the backstory.